Sailing Long Distances Spain

A missed titcoin – or Victoria’s secret unveiled

I didn’t make up this one. On a Saturday morning, I went to a supermarket named Eroski. Yes, this name inspired many sailors to become experts in puns, we too. However, the little story I love to tell here started unexcepted. I was doing some shopping when a woman in her late forties rushed past me between two shelves, a bit rude, as we had body contact at the upper arms. I blamed her behavior on the sunshine and high temperatures. I had had three similar experiences with other women on the short way of half a kilometer to the market before. I waited for my turn at the till when a soft, almost sweet female voice behind me asked in fine English if I would mind letting her go first. I turned around, looked right in the face of my ‘hot blood,’ grinned, and said sure, my pleasure. Honestly, just between you and me, she was a good-looking dark blond.
She walked past me, and a cloud of heavy cold smoke hung in the air. She put the beer can on the conveyer belt, held a Euro coin in hand, and waited for her turn. Instantly I noticed her shaking hand. I looked closer, saw her entire body shaking, and felt sorry for her. The cashier scanned the bin. The woman handed the coin and was about to dash out when the cashier said, it’s 1,10 Euros. ‘What?’ the smoking customer replied in an astonishing rude tone. The lady at the till repeated ten cents short. In response, the hot customer reached into her cleavage, slipped her right hand into the bra, and fingered for something. When it comes to bras’, I will spare you my strict scientific thoughts and the question of whether the lady’s outstanding body characteristics are fourth or fifth-degree swingers. Working in vain, she pulled the top a wee bit down, noticed all the full attention she drew of the cashier and me, and turned away. I raised my eyebrows and smiled at the lady waiting for the money. She too grinned, and we almost stopped breathing, of the mere thought of what might happen next. I quickly thought about what a gentleman was supposed to do. ‘Do you need a skilled hand, ma’am?’ What do they say in Spanish? Usted necesita ayuda? The lady knew her bra and its content well, pulled out a ten-cent coin, put it on the conveyer belt, and almost ran away.
On my way back to the boat, I gave a wide berth to women on a possible collision course and classified my observation. Muy facil, what it is called in Spanish, very easy – Victoria’s secret unveiled. Guys, the secret is all about money. Need some? Shake your wife. Possible puns are up to you.

My mistake? I should have asked the cashier for the coin. Pay you a Euro for the ten cents to put more emphasis on my need. Why? I could honestly say, folks, I just got my first titcoin!